I’ve been off to a slow start here with the new blog.
You know, because life. All the things, like everyone deals with all the time. Navigating, juggling.
I’ve got a pile of ideas for posts covering practical creative stuff I think people will find inspiring. But this is also about me being real. About my mistakes and challenges and the hope maybe my experiences spark something for someone else trying to uncomplicate their own life.
I’ve joked (ok maybe just with myself) that with what’s been going on I should have named this blog “Complicate.” With a 93 year old mother with dementia living in Memory Care during Covid where family has no in-person contact: concerns over her well-being as she ages and fails more quickly from this, the strong possibility of becoming a primary caregiver in her final days and navigating hospice and in-home nursing care, all really weird and foreign adulting issues for my little brain. Attempting to help another person I care about get away from an abusive, destructive situation. Reinventing my
waning morphing and changing art business. Flourishing summer crops need attention today or they’ll go to waste, others require extra attention just to stay alive, weeds on the property keep growing (like weeds). The pets just keep pooping and it’s not going to scoop itself. Right? All the things. The world keeps turning and stuff keeps happening. Big important stuff, tiny dumb stuff, all of it.
We all have our versions of this, right? Faced with varying levels of hardship and concerns, it just keeps coming at us all the time. You’ve got families, kids, jobs, lack of jobs, worries: what’s happening with school, church, sports, birthdays, weddings, all the things that filled your life before. Beloved local small businesses are dropping like flies. People are grouchy about having sweaty faces under their masks. Conspiracy theories are thriving. Everyone is mad at “the other side”. Everyone just that much more on-edge about each little situation, the general vibe of unrest hangs over us like a thick fog. In that fog we have this tendency to hang onto worry and fear over everything else.
Days go by so fast; seems like way faster than they did before. I mean, life does that anyway as we get older, right? But in this new and different semi-quarantine/whatever-it-is world, time is different, schedules are wonky. I’ve been taking breaks from social media for my mental health, but then lose track of the time that goes by during those breaks. I start each day with an intended schedule and list of goals, but then the day is over and I let stuff slide: oops, time’s up, I guess I’ll just do yoga tomorrow (then I wonder why my bones are so crackly and I feel tired the next day). Stuff on my to-do list gets pushed one more day, over and over again. Maybe I should have been more realistic when planning those blocks of time in the first place, or: maybe I shouldn’t have gotten sidetracked with that one project, or: yeah but my slow internet made that task take way longer than it should have…. You know, it’s always something.
But it’s ok. The important part for me is to not beat myself up about it. Keep facing forward. Every day, every moment, gives us the opportunity to reboot, refresh, start over, move on, all of it. What complicates a lot of us is our habit of worrying about the past. Why did it happen that way, or: but that one thing held me back, or: I should have done that differently…
Seriously none of that matters in this moment and all the moments to follow.
Today is the best day ever because it gives me the opportunity to move forward and work toward all my dreams. My past is just a bunch of lessons I’ve learned and stuff I now have the opportunity to build on, and today I’m grateful for every one of those things.
Today I wish you all the peace and confidence and mostly gratitude to face forward and do the best you can. Because, that’s enough.